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Yes, it is me, and I know what you're thinking.
Well, no, I don't, but let me explain.
I'm in the middle of a cunning prank that I'm pulling in order to get out of a sticky situation
caused by a previous prank, which in fact I did as a result of...
the prank.
Oh, hang on, I forgot where I was.
Let me begin again.
It all started when the prank at school...
went horribly wrong.
I ended up alienating everybody, being suspended for a week,
and grounded by my parents.
And now they're off to Wacky World Amusement Park in the Edmonton Mall and leaving me at home.
Andy, your mother and I would like you to know that this hurts us more than it hurts you.
But we feel we have to be cruel to be kind.
The punishment must fit the crime.
One more cliche and I'm gonna hurl.
Yeah, Dad, I understand.
It's just that I had my...
heart set on finally meeting Dicky Moose in the fur.
Well, perhaps you should have thought about that before you pulled...
the prank.
At least, could you bring me back his autograph?
Of course, son.
We'll miss you.
We're going to Wacky World!
Woo-hoo!
You are going to confine yourself to your room, stay out of my way, forget about pranks and parties...
I don't think parties are an option, considering everyone in school hates my guts at the moment.
Shut it and listen.
Most importantly, do not do anything to interfere with my date with Craig.
I have a date with Lori myself.
What?
Well, I did until she canceled.
She's mad at me because of...
the prank.
That's a good one.
What's so funny?
Oh, come on.
You and Lori on a date?
As if.
No self-respecting girl would be caught dead with a dweeb like you.
I'll have you know that Lori thinks I'm...
cool.
Cool?
Have you told her that your heart really belongs to...
Dicky Moose?
Skip.
They seek him here, they seek him there, they seek him, seek him everwhere!
Ah, catchy phrase.
And what do you want?
I'd have thought you'd be happy to see me, considering that the whole school's not on speaking terms with you because of...
the prank.
No thanks to you.
You're the one who got my list of materials mixed up.
One of these days, I'm going to have to tell you what...
the prank was.
Worst of all, Lori canceled our date.
You had a date with Lori?
Yeah.
A real date?
What's so funny about that?
Well, I mean, you and Lori?
I fail to grasp your point.
I just have trouble picturing you two together.
Unless she's picking you out of a police lineup.
So you don't think Lori will go on a date with me, huh?
Considering she hates you? No.
Well, I'll show you and my half-daft sister.
Before the end of the week, I'll have a date with Lori,
or my name's not Andy Larkin.
I want you to get me a knee-length coat
and a longish brown wig.
Well, let's see...
Montreal, Quebec...
Time for a little research.
Let me guess, Celine Dion?
Close, but no cigar.
I happen to be my long-lost identical twin brother
from Montreal.
Uh, I'm sorry.
I thought you said long-lost identical twin brother from Montreal.
I got the idea from watching The Scarlet Pimpernel.
It's about this dude who fought for the French,
but posed as a bumbling English bureaucrat.
And you're gonna pose as a bumbling French dude from Montreal?
No, I'm gonna pose as a really cool French dude from Montreal.
Lori will be begging me to go on a date.
And how do you figure that?
How can she resist? I'll be like forbidden fruit.
Yeah, fruitcake, more like.
Has it occurred to you that you hardly speak any French?
Neither does Lori. I can bluff my way through.
What if Lori comes looking for Andy
while you're dolled up like his brother?
They seek Andy Larkin here.
They seek Andy Larkin there.
He's the world's greatest prankster anywhere.
Andy?
Is that you?
Comment?
What's this all about?
Have you turned goth?
Mademoiselle, je, how you say, not knowing what you speak of.
Bonjour.
Let her chase me for a change.
I know this is like asking Sergeant Preston
to spill the beans on his horse,
but what's with Andy?
Uh, how do you mean?
He was dressed up like Celine Dion
and speaking in foreign tongues this morning.
Is he up to another one of his stupid pranks?
Hmm. This morning?
No, that couldn't have been Andy.
His parents have grounded him.
Lacky!
Okay, here she comes.
Time for phase two of Operation Fleur de Lis.
All right, what's this about?
Ah, the annoying Anglo again.
I think you're, uh,
comprend what the problem is about.
Tu is mixing moi up with, uh, Andy.
Je suis Jean Thomas,
his frère from Montréal.
Oh, knock it off!
It is true.
Only recently did we discover each other
after having been, uh, how you say, uh,
separated at the birthing?
John Thomas, eh?
Non, Jean, with a soft J.
Well, Jean Thomas with a soft J,
if you are from Montréal, how do you say,
if you practice hard, you may one day win the Stanley Cup?
In French?
Uh, tes oreilles sont si gros
que tout ressemble à la coupe Stanley.
Well, uh...
Anyone can learn French,
especially when they want to pull a stupid prank.
Grow up, Andy.
This is gonna be a bit trickier than I thought.
Uh, what's with the posing?
Can you say Photoshop?
Okay, Photoshop.
Our boy Andy couldn't make it here,
but he's such a big fan.
Could you autograph his book?
Oh, why, of course.
Gah!
Why, you!
Come back here, you funny guy!
Oh, hi.
I'm so glad it's you.
I've been lying here thinking about how much I miss you.
Lying being the key word.
I'm really miserable not being able to see you every day.
I keep thinking about your sparkly eyes,
your shiny hair...
Hey, desperate times call for desperate measures.
Woo-hoo!
Look, Andy, I've had enough of this silliness.
Why don't you get lo...
What's wrong?
It is this.
Oh, they make me think of all the things I missed
growing up without my frere.
Wow.
It still amazes me how easy it's become
to cut and paste using the technology we have today.
You can make people believe almost anything.
And some people should believe
that if anyone hurts my friends,
they'll wish they had never been born.
I'll be over there if you need me, Lori.
Nice try, Andy. You almost had me there.
I am becoming fatigued avec your doubting.
Perhaps how you say make you believing
from the bouche of mon frere himself?
Andy, comment ça va?
I am well, merci.
Andy, j'aime si avec le irritant de Lori.
Oui, of course.
Hello?
Oh, hi. I'm so glad it's you.
I've been lying here thinking about how much I miss you.
Andy?
I'm really miserable not being able to see you
every day.
I keep thinking about your sparkly eyes,
your shiny hair.
Ask him what he told me about the pranking.
What did you tell your brother about the...
I mean, the pranking?
You mean about my pranking days being over?
It's true, Lori.
I've sworn off pranking forever.
I'd like to apologize for all the trouble I caused you
because of...
the prank.
And I don't blame you for canceling our date.
Well, perhaps I was a bit too hard on you.
I know I'm not in a position to ask you for any favors,
but seeing as I'm grounded and can't leave the house,
could you show Jean-Thomas around East Gackle for me?
Well, I-I'm not sure...
It would mean a lot to me,
him being my long-lost brother.
Well, I'll ask him.
Oh!
I told you to stay in your room, dork!
I'm stuck here with the amazing Dweeb Boy,
and Mom and Dad are off having the time of their lives!
I'll just be a minute.
Ah!
Will I get my hands on...
I don't know what to say.
Mwah! I accept your apology, ma chérie.
Yuck! She must have had biology this afternoon.
What did mon frère want?
He wanted me to show you around his gackle.
He has a gross heart, but you don't have to, how you say,
put yourself out. No, no, no, I'd be happy to.
Especially after the way I've treated you. But there's not much in our town
to see. How about the French connection?
Come again? The film. It is playing at the East Gackle
Oneplex, no? Yes, of course. How silly of me.
Let's say tomorrow at seven?
Yes, tomorrow. I'll see you then, then.
It's like, how you say, taking bonbon from
ze baby. Tch! Formaldehyde.
Now, I know this looks like a dream come true,
but this is the last thing I need. My mission is complete.
My prank is in the bag. Time to move on.
You know, I can't help but think about my dear frère,
Andy. He's such a nice homme, and he likes you very much.
You know, I can't help but think about my dear frère, Andy.
He's such a nice homme, and he likes you very much.
I like him too, but he's a bit too silly for me.
I prefer more mature boys.
Oh, no. Think fast, prankmeister.
I did not want to have to tell you so soon, but I must
go soon. Yeah, me too. It's those giant drinks they serve.
No, no. I mean, I must return to Montreal.
Really? Oh, I'm sorry, ma chérie, but my family
need me back to help out in Audepennaire. I'll miss you.
But we can keep in touch. We can exchange phone numbers and email
addresses. Uh... And my parents were talking of taking a trip to
Montreal. We can get together there. It'll be great. You can
show me your date panner.
I never knew
this side of Laurie. She's not as innocent as I thought. Well, anyway,
it gives me an idea. It's time she saw the darker
side of Jean Thomas. She'll run faster than a goose through a butcher
shop. I feel I must tell you, I am
not who I seem to be. I knew it.
It really is you, Andy Larkin. No, no. It really is
I, Jean Thomas. What I meant is that you don't really
know me. How do you mean? You are so nice, chérie.
I must tell you the truth about me. When I was six,
I took a Montreal Canadian duke from a sports store without
paying. Really? Then when I was eight, I went to the
old port and painted naughty French words on a college horse.
You're kidding. No. And when I was eleven,
I went to the top of the mountain and mooned an Australian tourist.
I will understand if you never want to see me again.
Don't be silly. You're such a naughty boy.
I don't believe it.
I don't know what happened. One minute I was telling Laurie I was responsible
for the Olympic Stadium roof. The next, she was making a date with me for tomorrow
evening at Beans and Burger. My parents are due back around that
time. I gotta find a way to get out of it. Let me see.
You've just been sitting in a dark cinema with the girl of your dreams.
You walked home hand in hand. She thinks you're the cat's pajamas.
And now you have another date with her tomorrow evening. You'll understand
if I don't shed a tear for you. Problem is, my sarcastic little friend,
she has the hots for Jean Thomas, not Andy Larkin.
You! What are you doing out of your room?
I'm entertaining guests. Since when did that four-eyed little
pustule qualify as a guest? I'm going to be so offended
as soon as I find out what pustule means. Call me
overly sensitive, but are you upset about something, sis?
If you must know, I found out that Craig has another
girlfriend. He was just toying with me.
He's like all men. Selfish, ignorant, rude, stupid, and piggish.
I never want to see him again.
Are you going to let her talk about us like that? Of course. Okay.
No, I mean of course. That's how I can break up Laurie and Jean Thomas.
No girl can stand being two-timed.
All I have to do is show up tomorrow with another date on my arm.
She'll drop JT like a rabid beaver. Not a bad idea.
There's only one thing wrong with it. And what's that? Everyone, including
both genders, still hates you for pulling the prank.
How on earth are you going to find someone to go out with you on such short
notice?
You'll choke the way you're
going at it. I can't help it.
I get hungry when I'm nervous.
It's Laurie. Stop eating. I don't want her to think Jean Thomas dates
pigs. Laurie, what are you doing here?
What do you mean, what am I doing here? We have a date.
Mon dieu. What's that tonight? Jean Thomas, who's this?
Uh, this? This is, uh...
Oh, I cannot lie to you. This is the other
woman. The other woman? I told you I was
the, how you say, rater. How could you?
What can I say?
I am haute verriere.
Well, let me help you cool off.
Well, I think that went well. Okay, I got a bit wet, but let's face it,
Jean Thomas really asked for it. Laurie is really upset right now,
but Andy's waiting in the wings to console her. Yeah, all things
considered, this prank has been a resounding success.
Shit, please!
Gee, thanks.
Funny. Come on, let's slip out the back way. I don't want Laurie running
into J.T. again. Laurie, what's
wrong? You were right. Jean Thomas is no different from any
other boy. He's sitting in beans and burger with another girl as we speak.
If I never see him again, it'll be too soon.
I'll teach him to upset my friend.
Hey, it's Hazel Striner! I'm
looking for Jean. Oh, hi. I'm so glad it's you.
I've been lying here thinking about how much I miss you.
Andy? I'm really miserable not being able to see you every day.
I keep thinking about your sparkly eyes, your shiny hair.
Ooh.
Well, I see the grieving period for Craig is over. Well, here's something
to turn you back into your horrible, miserable self.
Who's the guy with the ponytail? Me.
I was out on a date with Laurie. I'm in no hurry. I'll be around
when you apologize for ever doubting me.
You? Yeah, and I'm Anne Murray. It is me.
Forget it, bro. There's no way you're talking me into believing
that guy is you. And what I said the other day still goes.
No self-respecting girl would be caught dead with a dweeb like you.
Would you believe it?
It seems my JT act was too good.
Oh, well, you can't win them all. Even the prank
didn't turn out as I expected. Which reminds me, I was going to tell you
what it was. It all started with a visit to the...
Get off! You're crushing me! Yes, I stand corrected.
Andy, you want to cool it? Mom and Dad will be home
any minute.
Four days hiding and running from a homicidal maniac dressed in a
moose costume. Just wait till I get my hands on that son of yours.
Ahhhh!
Yeah!
Don't you close your eyes, a big surprise is coming! Andy's up to something!
You can visualize and organize a strength that you could not imagine!
Yeah! My name is Andy, everybody knows me!
One big scratch for nobody's better! My name is Andy, everybody knows me!
One big scratch for nobody's better!
Yeah!
Adam is Sure to Kill!
I'm the Attack To 000!
I'm The Attack To 000.
This is the provision ofe
I'm the Attack To 000.
One two one.
A little boy being a solved game pervert. I'm the Attack To 000.